This year has felt really up and down in terms of things I've wanted to do, and what I've actually finished. While I have no shortage of ideas, sometimes my ideas feel stuck, sometimes I can't decide which idea to focus on, and sometimes I've just misjudged my capacity and what I can realistically achieve.
And if you have periods where you might feel like that too, then maybe this post might help you as well.
It might be different for each of us, but maybe you might relate to some of these:
If you've ever wondered why this happens so consistently (and is often, frustratingly, the only way we feel consistent!) it can be helpful to look at what's happening in our brains so we need to look at the Default Mode Network (DMN) and the Task Positive Network (TPN).
The DMN is the part of our brain where our minds wander. It turns on when we're relaxing, reflecting or daydreaming. The TPN is the part that lights up when we are actively engaged in a task. Ideally, these two networks act a bit like a see-saw and when one goes up, the other goes down.
We also need to understand the role that dopamine and noradrenaline play here as well. Dopamine acts a bit like a spotlight for us, highlighting what matters in the moment. Noradrenaline helps to keep us locked onto that spotlight, essentially filtering out distractions for us. In many neurotypical brains, that focused spotlight is consistently bright so even moderately interesting tasks stay illuminated.
For ADHD brains, that spotlight might become dimmer and our filter might be lower so distractions become louder. This often means as soon as a task loses it's novelty, or we come up against a barrier, that light dims right down. This is a pretty huge part of why our executive functions can feel so challenging. If we have too much or too little dopamine or noradrenaline, we struggle to stay on task.
Once our spotlight has dimmed, our brains naturally drift back to its default setting, the Default Mode Network. So, this is often why, when you stall on one project, your mind might instantly lights up with three completely new, unrelated ideas. This isn't about willpower or laziness, your brain is simply reacting to a drop in your dopamine or noradrenaline signals. Without that signal telling your brain that what you're doing is important, the DMN takes over and you're back to daydreaming, rumination and on the hunt for something new and shiny to interest you.
I share this with a lot of clients on a whole range of topics, but often the first step can be to simply acknowledge that it's going to happen. We know that often ADHDers are interest based and now that we understand a bit more about why that happens, we can hold that knowledge and plan for it.
When we plan for it, we can sstart to take more control and reduce frustration which can make it easier to create a way forward. Knowing that it is a biological response (your spotlight fading), rather than a character flaw, can make it much easier to treat yourself with compassion rather than frustration.
So, we know what's happening and why, but we still might need some help to actually flip the see-saw back to the TPN. Some ideas might be:
If you're working on a longer term project, leave it somewhere that's easy to pick up next time, a space where you know exactly what comes next. Reducing the friction required to start lowers the amount of dopamine you need to initiate the task again.
Novelty, interest, challenge, extremely urgent. Sometimes integrating one of these can help to kick start you again.
Honestly, I think this is the hardest bit. But there's no point being harder on yourself for something that isn't your fault. One way I like to think about it is that even if I've completely lost motivation for something, whatever I try to help me get back to where I was is helping to give me information about what I need. So even if it's not working, I'm still learning something. It might be that I'm just not as interested as I thought I was in something. I try and use that to figure out what I want to do next. Sometimes that helps me to move forward, and sometimes it's about acknowledging that I'm going to leave a project behind. Maybe I'll pick it up another time, maybe I won't.
This is also something that I talk about with coaching clients and if you'd like to talk more about what coaching could look like for you, you can read about what coaching with me looks like here.
If you'd also like to go down this rabbit hole, here's one study that I explored for this post - Kessler, et al (2017) Increased default-mode variability is related to reduced task-performance and is evident in adults with ADHD in Cognitive Neuroscience and Neuroimaging
