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ADHD, Autism and Work-Life Balance: Why Loving Your Job Isn’t Always Enough

I’ve been thinking a lot about balance recently because as an autistic ADHDer, I often swing between really high highs, and really low lows. It's often either doing everything or doing nothing so finding the right balance and managing my energy and mood is something that I have to be aware of all the time. 

 

Doing the work I love (and what it costs)

 

This year, I’ve been doing more HR consulting alongside my coaching. And I really love it. It gives me a different perspective on the challenges that organisations face when they’re supporting their teams with wellbeing and inclusion. I love how creative I can be, supporting in a range of ways, finding solutions to different issues and getting involved in a range of projects. It feels like I’m using the parts of my brain that light up in the best way.

 

But even though I love it, some days I finish work and my whole body feels like it’s vibrating because I’m so overstimulated and hadn’t realised until I stopped. And not because the work I'm doing is bad (it really isn’t!), but because even things I love take energy. And without enough space to recover, I can feel burnout creeping in.

 

And maybe you feel like this too, where the idea of ‘balance’ feels really difficult to manage. One minute you’re in flow, doing work you care deeply about and the next, you're completely out of spoons, wondering how you got here again. I often find it hard to notice the tipping point until I’m already on the other side of it.

 

Gentle truths I’m holding 

 

Here’s what I’ve been learning (and unlearning) about balance:


  • Balance isn’t about perfect schedules. It’s about checking in regularly and honestly with how I feel.

  • Loving your work doesn’t mean it’s always sustainable. Passion can often hide exhaustion and I think for me at least, this is where my cycles of burnout have been most prominent.

  • Rest isn’t something I need to earn. My body and brain need space even when (especially when) things are going ‘well’.


I've realised that balance might look more like seasons than symmetry. There are times I can go all in, and times I need to step way back. I'm learning how to recognise the signals before I crash.

 

What I’m trying now

 

Sometimes it feels like I’m in constant experimentation mode and I wonder if this is something that particularly resonates when you’re ADHD and autistic, when your needs might often be contradictory.  Some things I’m playing with:


  • Building a lot more rest time into my work calendar especially after consulting days.


  • Listening to my body instead of overriding it with ‘shoulds’.


  • Tracking energy, not just time. Noticing how different tasks leave me feeling and adjusting accordingly.


This is all ongoing. I don’t have a perfect system. But I’m learning to be a bit more gentle with myself. That’s progress too, so little tick for me (and maybe some celebratory cake!).

 

If you’re also navigating that delicate balance between doing what you love and keeping enough of yourself to enjoy it, I'd love to share something that might help.

 

A free mini workbook + guide to managing your energy

 

If you’ve been looking for a gentler way to understand and manage your energy as a neurodivergent professional, I’ve just released an updated version of my free workbook: A Mini Guide to Working With Your Energy. This version now includes new pages on energy accounting and weekly check-ins, plus a rest menu to help you explore the kinds of rest that truly support you. You can download it for free (printable + editable versions available) and use it in whatever way works best for you.




Working with me


If you'd like support to find a more joyful working life and you feel that ADHD/AuDHD career coaching could help, you can find out more about working with me here

 
 
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